How to Recognize Gaslighting and Get Help

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We are all responsible for the choices we make in life. Our thoughts lead to our feelings and in turn our thoughts and feelings influence our behaviours. They do what it takes to try to hear, understand and empathise with the other, and in turn express themselves in helpful ways to help the other person understand them. Self-Responsibility requires giving up blaming others. Men who use coercive control against their female partner deny their behaviours outright. Men who use coercive control use rationality and reasoning, by for example reminding her of times he was right and she was wrong. Denying, minimising and blaming all lead to obstructing change. Here are some experiences that women have when living with a male partner who denies, minimises, and blames…. Denial Denial entails acting as if he has not been abusive, not been controlling, not caused any harm.

Accomplish you secretly want revenge on ancestor who have slighted you — although you hold onto resentment instead of doing anything about it? Or accomplish you work relentlessly, to the advantage of exhaustion? These behaviours are archetypal masochistic traits within the personality. As of a psychological perspective, the self-defeating behaviours that a masochist endures are a lot done by the self to the self.